A yawn, and you were gone.
The person who was my mother ceased to exist in this part of the universe.
Did your spirit take flight?
Did your soul find peace with the whole dying thing? Safe journey? Where did you go?
One minute you were living, breathing, holding my hand. The next your breath ceased and your heart stopped and no sound was to be heard – just the one yawn and then, you were gone.
I miss you. I miss hearing you say Hejsa Kim when you say hi on the phone. I miss you calling me Kimalas. No one else calls me that. I miss your voice. I want to hold your hand with the crooked, time-worn fingers and tell you I love you like so many times before. I want to give you a hug and hear you say ahhh when I do. I want to hear you laugh in that special way you had, loud and free of pretense or constraint. I can’t figure out whether I should say had or has – you’re still here in my heart. I’m not used to it yet, you being out of reach. You loved me I know. What do I do without you? I love you mum. I miss you mum. My anchor, my safe place in a storm, my cheerleader, my friend, my mom. One last breath, one yawn and you were gone.